When you’re wondering how to deal with betrayal, these tips can help you determine which path to take. Being betrayed is when someone violates your trust in them. Betrayal can trigger many complex emotions, which can leave you feeling overwhelmed. You can experience betrayal in relationships or from friends and family.
This experience may make you wonder how to deal with betrayal and move forward. It can be hard to manage the emotions, but you can heal from it and overcome the hard feelings. Consider the following tips to deal with negative feelings that are frequently associated with feelings of betrayal.
How to heal from betrayal
1. Talk with someone you trust
Talking about the situation with someone you can trust can be healing and help you clear your thoughts. You can turn to a close friend or loved one, but a therapist is also an option if you feel uncomfortable discussing it with people you know.
2. Practice self-care
Taking care of your physical health can help you heal from betrayal. Licensed therapist and wellness coach Rebecca Capps explains, “Self-care after betrayal can include eating balanced meals, getting enough sleep, and engaging in activities that bring you joy.”
Aside from taking care of your physical health, relaxing and calming your mind can help. If you overthink while lying in bed, consider taking a bath or listening to soothing music. You can also turn to your hobbies to boost your mood.
3. Acknowledge and accept
Denying the betrayal won’t help you cope, but acknowledging the situation can. Then, you can accept and clarify what occurred, helping you move forward. Acceptance allows you to feel your emotions and work through them.
4. Don’t blame yourself
When healing from betrayal, you might wonder if it’s your fault. This thinking is detrimental and can interfere with healing, so consider reminding yourself whenever necessary. No matter what occurred between you, the only person at fault is the one who did the betraying.
5. Be patient with yourself
Healing from betrayal is a process that you can’t rush. It might consume your life for a while, but you’ll feel better each day if you keep trying to overcome it. Try to give it time.
6. Give yourself space from the person that betrayed you
Healing from betrayal is hard enough, but it can be even more difficult when the person who hurt you is around. Consider asking them to give you space to process and think about the situation. Giving yourself space also sometimes requires limiting the information you receive about that person. You can ask mutual friends not to mention them and disconnect from social media to avoid updates.
7. Practice forgiveness
When you forgive someone for betraying you, it doesn’t mean what they did is OK. Instead, it means you’re releasing resentment and choosing personal peace. Forgiveness can help you feel empathy and compassion, positively affecting your well-being. Experts indicate it can:
decrease blood pressure
lower heart rate
ease anxiety and depression
improve heart health
Forgiving someone also doesn’t mean you must let them back into your life. You can forgive someone without rebuilding a relationship with them.
8. Avoid retaliation
Being betrayed is incredibly hurtful, and you might want to get back at the person who hurt you. But revenge is detrimental, and you’ll likely regret it later. Thinking about revenge interferes with your healing and leads to negative thoughts, and it’s best to try and focus on something else. You might think they deserve punishment, but it won’t improve the situation or help you feel better.
How does betrayal affect the brain?
There are a few types of betrayal, each affecting you differently. These include betrayal in the following relationships:
romantic
friends
family members
co-workers
Being betrayed by a close friend can be devastating because friends are essential for physical and mental health. Having them in your life can decrease stress levels and help you feel like you belong somewhere. When they aren’t there for you, don’t defend you, or betray you in another way, you may not be as open to future friendships. Betrayal from a family member occurs when secure bonds get broken, and it can contribute to a lack of emotional regulation. It can also lead to aggressive behaviors and negative communication. When you get betrayed, it can make you feel a lack of support and meaningful connections. You might:
lash out in anger
blame yourself
lose self-confidence
withdraw emotionally
Let's recap
Experiencing betrayal is hard, and you’ll likely feel many conflicting and overwhelming emotions. When you wonder how to deal with betrayal, these tips can help you find a method that works. If you don’t find ways to heal, it could interfere with your everyday activities and mental health. Healing can strengthen you as you learn to handle issues with those you care about. You can overcome betrayal, and being patient with yourself can help you get through the hardship.
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